Writer, zoologist and gundog enthusiast, Pippa blogs on life in the countryside

Men don’t get dieting

Like most women,I know a thing or two about dieting as I have been doing it on and off for most of my adult life.

Yes, I know,  if it worked I wouldn’t still be doing it.  On the other hand, who knows how huge I would be if I stopped?!

Men on the other hand don’t ‘get’ it.   

This morning I sent Mr Multi-Track up into the village to  purchase for me the ingredients for my frugal lunch.   “Fetch me some smoked salmon” says I ,  “and some coleslaw”  to eat with my salad,  (note the emphasis on the word salad).

Mr M returns a few minutes later with smoked salmon,  coleslaw….. and a jam doughnut. 

Yes,  a JAM DOUGHNUT!

“Whats this?”   exclaims I  angrily

“ …a jam doughnut?” offers Mr M, taking a step back

“What is it doing in my kitchen?” I demand.

“ My diet is ruined”   wails I.   

Mr M then explains that only yesterday,  I had expressed extreme disappointment at his failure to procure for me the Jam Doughnut clearly listed in capital letters on his shopping list.  He was merely making amends for yesterday’s omission,  and would I kindly keep my freaking hair on!

He also points out in a most superior sort of way,  that I don’t actually have to eat the bloody thing.

You see. 

 They just don’t get it.

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